“Removing the Filters…”

Putting up “filters” is what we typically do when we want to “Hear what we want to hear, and See what we want to see.”

My former manager often coached me regarding this during my weekly performance reviews.  He said I did this often when speaking to corporate clients.

For example: 

Me:  “My contact at ABC Company is too busy right now. He was traveling, just got promoted and summer-time is their busy season...”

My Manager:  “Did you ASK HIM for the business?”

Me: “Uh….No.”

My Manager: “Then you don’t really know. If he is not ready, let him tell you. You are making assumptions.”

Wow…I was already judging their circumstances and responses before they told me.  Maybe it was my protective shield from dealing with rejection…

As I reflect on this, I remember the phrase “Seeing the world through ROSE-COLORED GLASSES.”

I realize that we often judge the word through our own “filters”:  Our experiences; how we see the world; our fears; our insecurities, etc.

We believe that the world should be AS WE SEE IT…not how it really it…

Now, when I am initially “appalled” or shocked when people don’t do or say or behave as I THINK they should, I am learning to ask myself:

• How did they ACTUALLY act?
• Is it in line with who I AM?
• Does that make it wrong?
• Did they break the law?
• Would I have personally acted differently?
• Have I had their experiences?

Sadly…we don’t see the world as it is. We see it how we THINK it should be.  If it doesn’t align with that—we automatically stamp it as “WRONG.”

This may be something we should all think more deeply about …

I know I am....