Mysteries of the Ritual of Death…

Most of us are apprehensive, even fearful, of death. Biblically, we know that we all will die, and then there is the Judgment. We know that this is the path we all must take to spend eternity with the Lord. However, it is such an “unknown” that we often have anxiety about it. Hebrews 9:27 (NKJV): “And as it is appointed for men to die once, but after this the judgment.”

Many of us believe that we will live forever. We haven’t truly dealt with our own mortality. We attend others funerals without any regard that one day others will be attending ours. However, there are traditions & rituals that are a mystery to me.

I always find it ironic:

#1 - Why do people not call, send a card, or visit someone when they are sick or critically ill, but take time off work to go to the funeral?
Maybe because we are too busy?

#2 - Why do companies not allow time-off work to say your Good-byes…but allow 3 -5 days off for Bereavement?
Maybe because they have allocated "death" into their bottom-line, but not life?

#3 – Why do people say “I’m sorry” when someone dies?

My experience has revealed to me that people just don’t know what to say. Why “apologize” for someone’s passing away?

#4 – Why do people say, “If you need anything, please call me?”

This is said by someone to feel good about themselves.

The recipient of this offer can barely remember their own phone number, let alone yours. Also, they are so overwhelmed with these types of offers that they probably will not remember that you offered.

Anyone who has dealt with death KNOWS that the family always needs something, whether they know it or not. I have begun saying, “I will call you before I return to see what you may need.”

#5 – Why bring food to the family?

My experiences revealed to me how important this is. I recall grieving at 9:00 a.m. in the morning, and then finding it was 3:00 p.m. I hadn’t eaten anything. I was starving! TaDa! Food is ready and available. Greatly appreciated.

#6 – Why do people come supposedly to console the grieving family; however, the family ends up consoling them?

Please reserve your own personal grief. Consoling you is unnecessarily taxing on the family.

#7 – Why are funerals important?

Funerals and Memorial Services are for the LIVING. They provide a means of closure and acceptance of the loss of a loved one. They offer a final opportunity to reminisce about the person’s life, as well as a window into our own mortality. 

Let’s be diligent in responding to others before they pass.

As for me: Please…Please…I love flowers…I am very sentimental…Please tell me you love me NOW.  Please let me smell my flowers NOW. (FYI…I love Stargazer Lilies & cut flowers.J) Let me read your wonderful cards & expressions of Love…Now…while I can enjoy them…Call, Email, Text, Write, Visit me NOW…while I can be blessed by you.

I won’t be able to …lying in my casket…